Lets be honest, we live in a more hook-up society. Back in the day, people who joined online dating sites were serious about finding someone. There was actually a negative connotation about even being on an online dating site that you had to convince yourself to even join. We all have been there and know someone who lied about where they met just because they met the person online. The good thing is that this has changed and now many people are meeting online. The bad thing is that online dating has also changed to be place that everyone is on…even those who are not intentionally dating or want an authentic connection.
So how do you navigate in a world of hook-up apps, shirtless mirror pictures, Instagram models, and OnlyFan pages? It is easy to create an account and have 100 messages within the first 24 hours but a week later, you still have no true connection with anyone. You are still just as single as the day you downloaded that app. Below are some tips that can help you attract the right type of people online and possibly also stop some of the ones that don’t have good intentions from contacting you.
Have a Detailed Profile
Sometime in the past few years, it became uncool to add details to your online dating profile. We know you have ran across pages that just say “Ask me later” or “Here is my Instagram page”. This actually doesn’t attract the right type of people and it is an indication that the person cannot put in the small effort to show their personality. How can you take someone seriously if they can’t even put the initial effort. This is why we recommend writing about yourself. It also gives them an idea of your personality and something to initiate the conversation with. Now we are not saying you should write an essay but do tell people a little bit about you and what your interests are.
Say that you are intentionally dating.
Now we have seen debates at kick backs about this one. Some say you shouldn’t say you are looking for a relationship on your profile because it might turn people off. We believe that this might actually attract the right type of person and separate you from the many profiles that are out there. If it turns someone off who only wants a fling then that’s a good thing. The key here is delivery. Try not to sound jaded or angry or that you are rushing things. Rather, just say you are here to date intentionally and build a connection that might lead to more if the chemistry is there. It is all about how you say it. Never list a bunch of rules and what you will or will not tolerate. Yes “Don’t hit me up for a fling”, “No I am not coming to your house”, “Don’t match unless you are going to chat” all sound very aggressive and are a turn off to most so avoid those lines.
Choose your photos wisely
A lot of people fail at online dating because they do not put in the time to take or post the correct photos. Yes you should post your best pictures but make sure that you are smiling and showing your personality. Yes a bunch of sexy pictures, beach pics, or muscle pics might attract people but it does not tell much about you. Remember, you can be sexy while still showing what you like to do in life. Avoid group photos, avoid mirror photos or pictures that are overly filtered. You want your photos to show that you are a happy and welcoming person. The same way you smile at someone in real life, ensure your photos smile at your potential boo.
Engage with people you are interested in
Believe it or not, people do care about your personality. People do want to date interesting fun people who communicate back. Ensure that you do not turn your online conversation into a Question/Answer question that ends up feeling like an interview in an attempt to seem reserved. So do ask questions about their interests and passions also. Get to know them and maybe even throw some jokes in there also. The connections start when effort is mutual. Also it is very hard to read people online, so if you are interested it is best to show it. We all know people have a short attention span online also. Energy is everything so bring the right energy.